Thursday, November 08, 2007

Reflections of...

...The Way Life used to Be...
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Photo by SnaggleTooth 2007
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In my young childhood mind, the word "vacation'' used to conjure up images of freedom from the restraints of schedule, late wake-up time, no school, extended bedtime deadline, loose TV restrictions, and the ability to choose lunch food besides the usual sandwich. On Summer Vacation, there was always a trip to Vermont to visit maternal relatives n a visit to Maine to visit with paternal relatives.
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All the cousins always hung out on our trips n got along very well. There were trips to parks, camps, hikes, bike riding, digging worms, fishing jaunts, boat rides, water skiing, mini bikes, horseback riding, card games, board games, ping pong matches, chalk drawings, book reading, group prayers, song singing, n performances of sorts.
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No real vacation time was complete without a large family gathering, n the obligtory dinners. some one had to set up extra table space, get chairs, set the table, prepare the food, put the food on the table, clear the dishes, put the leftover food away, and then wash n dry the dishes. This always seemed like alot of work to me.
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My mother always went through alot of trouble to assure these group meals would take place with as many people attending as possible. She was a true catalyst of these extended family get-togethers. I used to take these gatherings, along with Christmas n Thanksgiving vacation dinners for granted.
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I'd bemoan having to go to all the dinners, n doing all the chores associated with producing them. I never actually minded spending time with the people, however. These dinners is probably why I knew my family members so well throughout my life, from childhood to adult. People weren't strangers in a photograph. I remember Uncles Wright, Pete, n Marty, who've been long gone now.
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I can remember many dinners n many people who were there. Although you'd think the food was the main focus, it wasn't. The people were. Decades later you don't remember the dishes or flavors, you remember the familiar faces n voices, n the warm feelings felt as eye-contact, news, stories, words, n laughter were exchanged.
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Lately, I'm greatful I was forced into attending so many of these gatherings over the years, because little did I realize how soon circumstances would change the ability for them to occur. I no longer get to see all my cousins on holidays, nor do my children get to see theirs. These days I rarely get to see both of my grown children at the same time due to distance, lack of funds, n schedules.
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Out of five siblings, only one has the space to hold large gatherings. People both North n South lack travel funds. It's been difficult to even get together at events such as the weddings n funerals. Since my mother has been gone there's been no way to push us all to get to the same place n time.
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I often wish I had a home with a large room to invite people to a dinner. A place with a nice kitchen with new appliances, like an oven that could fit a turkey, n a dishwasher. The money to pay for the food, tableware, furniture, heat, n folks travel fares would help. Someday, I swear to myself, the untold riches I will certainly amass with my talents will lead to the day I'll get on the phone n push every one to attend this gathering. This is my not-so-lofty life goal.
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I believe "If you don't know where you want to go, you can't get there," not "You can't get there from here" (in an old man's Southern Drawl).
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It all may sound like Mission Impossible XXXII from the point I'm at now: Fighting to pay my own way, underpaid, living in a small apartment, wondering how I'll pay the bills this month n still have my truck. Freaking out about not being able to afford the new healthcare law here.
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I'm facing having to work on Christmas Day again, the third in a row I'll spend without any family people. That one gets old fast. I don't want to do it anymore. I want to see little kids open toys n have fun. I'm determined I'll change my circumstances in the near future for the better, so I don't have to keep repeating this depressing way to spend the best day of all.
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In a couple of weeks I'm taking the closest thing I can get to a vaca- 6 days without the day-job. At the end of it I get to travel to see MB n the kids for dinner. During the rest of it, I have such a huge list of things to tackle, it'll be tough to whittle them down to do-able size in the allotted time. Vacation chore number one is sleep!
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Now-a-days, the word "Vacation" conjures images of sleep, n working myself to a frazzle!

5 Comments:

At 3:35 PM, Blogger Milk Brain said...

I miss those dinners too... and it's really the family that I miss.. all of us all grown and spread out. BBM and I were just talking the other day.. we NEED a family reunion. it's been what 20 years? (give or take) or atleast the immediate you and your siblings and all the cousins. perhaps a middle of the eastern seaboard location.. to force Everyone to travel.. seems as though we have a florida contigent and a new england contigent.. although the cabin in ME is sounding nice right about now.. well not really.. it's too cold, but in the summer (but not during fly season)

can't wait to have you over!

 
At 4:23 AM, Blogger Snaggle Tooth said...

MB, especially with the holidays approaching, what Nanny did all those years now has great value.
It won't be long now!

 
At 9:01 PM, Blogger Buddy T. Doxie said...

A list hummmm ok we will see lol the best Buddy

 
At 3:41 AM, Blogger Snaggle Tooth said...

Pal will see more than you, buddy- Oh well!

 
At 3:12 PM, Blogger Janus Torrell said...

Vacation used to be the same for me..now when I have a day off I can sleep til 9:00 (For a guy that used to get off at 9:00 am, that is quite a turn.)

 

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