May May Be Better

This week, I'm so tired out from the previously predicted missed sleep while still continuing the night job, I probably shouldn't bother posting.


I needed to return a dvd to the library anyhow. plus it's not raining! I did these few altered pics last week, n found some old jokes That got a chuckle out of me again. I'd forgotten them from an email saved in a 2006 folder. I've been looking thru my old pc recently trying to find some lost pics n text. My old blog buddy, G.B.Miller, (now on tumblr) used to do this decade old re-joking sometimes.

Blonde jokes have always amused me. I was born blonde, n tho my hair has  darkened thru the years n looks more brownish (plus grey ) recently, I still claim, to be dirty, brassy blonde. There fore, I claim the right to insult myself with these. My brain has definitely been mush recently! Enjoy:

BLONDE LOGIC

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking........ And one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away..........Florida or the moon?"

The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida...?????"

CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.  After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.   She says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the  carburetor"
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"

SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"

 RIVER WALK

There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?" 

The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."

Same pic as above without changing the color. 

AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it. "Impossible!" says the doctor.  "Show me." The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream. The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?

"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde." 

"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."

BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"     

The American said, “We were the first on the moon!" 

The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!" 

The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.

To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"

KNITTING

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down  his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"

IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science &Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"    

She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"


TIME FOR THE DOGS (I changed the original title)

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named "Rolex" and one was named "Timex."

Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
"HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!

 

There must be new ones out there to do with newer devices ...  Plus I should research how sound waves travel in a vacuum. I know we can hear pulsars n send radio signals... Yawn - Sometime after my nap maybe ...  zzzz